Is he starting to come home?

[NikB]

((BH))

Sorry about the OW thing.. that had to sting.

I see that I have been making accuses for his behavior by labling him MLC.

SUCH a common mistake, and it really keeps people stuck. I think it's great that you recognized this.

He left me, he does not get to have a special connection to me. I can not handle that in a healthy way.

Also great that you recognize this.

I told myself that if he did this to me - tried to pull me in, lied to me then pull the rug out from under me, I would close the door.

Careful here... he didn't do this to you, you did it to yourself. I don't recall him ever telling you that he was thinking of trying again. You saw lots of positive signs, and you got your expectations and hopes too high. At least, that's how it looked from here. I may have missed something? I saw lots of positive signs, but never an "I want to come back."

(((BH)))

I am droping the rope that was my lifeline to him.....he has to now be on his own. I will not be mean or cold towards him, just completely indifferent for my own sake. Thank you everyone for all of the support you gave me. I truly did believe I was going to ba a success but after hearing his words and seeing his recent actions, I was foolong myself. Now is the time to heal the rest of the way.

Good!! This needed to happen regardless of the outcome.

That implies that I am trying to DB at this point and I no longer am. I am just trying to move on with as little emotional pain as possible.

That's part of DBing, too... detaching, allowing you to get through that emotional pain better.

He was doing all of these things in order to make himself feel good about who he is.

Careful... you don't know this. No ASSumptions.

I am so sorry to hear that the cancer has potentially spread, that must be so scary. I'm glad you'll have an answer on that soon. (((BH)))