I know the natural tendency is to want to have an opportunity to have a positive conversation, but that's not likely to happen while he's in this angry, controlling, punishing phase.

Hi Hoosier,

THANK you so much for stopping back by my thread. I have started a new thread in Newcomers ( I think I really need to go back there for a bit -- probably should have never left) but I did want to engage you in some feedback here. Can you/do you have any insight into this so-called phase??? Is it a phase he's in?

Here's a space for your answers: { } \:D


I just don't understand it. He was so mellow when I met him. During our marriage, he used to grab me by my wrists and turn me over in the bed to face up to him. My DB coach said it was his way of saying, "Talk to me." I would tend to go hide under the covers when we fought because I didn't know what else to do. He said I would "make him so mad."

I feel so horrible for the way I handled/didn't properly handle our arguements. I could have done better. I could have looked for solutions on the Internet, but I neglected him. I am feeling very guilty right now. I know that I have to take half the blame for this mess I'm in.

I've been dark now for three days, and I'm hurting terribly.

peace,
poet