Trying to pick myself off the ground enough to at least start getting my balance back. It's inch by inch right now. Luckily I know it will get better at some point & I will have a more positive outlook.
Yesterday was one of the most difficult days I've ever experienced, that it was my birthday didn't help matters much.
The day began with flowers & a banner across my front gate wishing me a happy B-Day, along with calls from friends & family.
H calls in the morning & asks me to please get S5 geared up for a phone call with him when he calls back in 20 minutes. The night before when he called to talk to him, my neighbor was over & he could hear S5 laughing & having fun so when I took the phone to him, he said he didn't want to talk to him. "Why do I have to talk to daddy everyday?", said as he took the phone. Anyway, I guess that didn't go over well because the next day there were no Happy B-Day wishes for me.
He was attending a funeral out of town & due back in the afternoon to take S5 for the night & us out to dinner.
Next phone call, also no B-Day greetings. I finally ask if there's something going on & he tells me he isn't prepared to say it yet, but will be later in the afternoon when he sees me.
My little voice is screaming to pay attention, I just didn't know exactly how.
Saturday nights are usually spent w/OW & maybe there was something going on from that end, b/c the "pick a fight" script was pretty apparent.
Dinner was a disaster...distant & uncomfortable. I didn't even recognize this man across from me saying "I don't want to order wine b/c I don't know anything about it anymore, but you can order some if you'd like." He drank a non-alcoholic beer, but did join me in having a glass later in the meal in what turned out to be the only 15 minutes of enjoyment.
The gist of it was him telling me as we arrived back at the house, that he would just let me keep S5 for the night instead of sleeping at his place. I told him it looked like he had other plans the whole time.
It went way south from there with him saying I was a c*nt all evening. what did I expect. A little later it was, "You're just angry that it's been 16 months & I was boffing (sp?) another woman, well actually, I still am. You bet." Pushed me out of the way & said, "I'll call the police if you touch me again??"
All of this in front of S5 & seemingly nothing I could do to stop it.
Since it was so out of context & over the top, I think OW may have given him an altimatum. Doesn't really matter why.
Shows up this morning at the front door, arms crossed, "I'm here to p/u S5. Oh, & I'll be keeping him for the night tonight too. After your behaviour last night, he'll be spending a lot more time with me, I'm his dad, it's my right."
"It's all you J, I tried to have a nice time at dinner & you just couldn't keep it together. See, we're like oil & water, you & me. Look at S5's eyes, it's all your doing."
I said, yes, when you started your affair & left, our R has not seen much positive light, you're right.
H-"I did not leave you because of another women, I left because you treated me like a piece of cr@p."
Anyway, this felt as scripted as the day of the bomb.
Out the door for some serious attempt at enjoying a beautiful day.
Sunny
Hi Dave, How was your trip? No response on the Retro, It looks like he made it a mute point w/justification of it being hopeless in our case.
