I remember one day you posted to me such a long and beautiful post, I was so hurt yet again, b/c of the X's actions.
You told me Lis, when are you going to have your expectations at zero? You were so right.
I am sorry that these turn of events feel like nails on the chalk board.
Ofcourse he should be paying more then less. Ofcourse he should just man the hell up and be a real father.
The fact is that he may never do it, but I will still pray that one day he grows a set.
In the mean time, you feel this new set of pangs, and know that this will not last as long as before. Know that you can bounce back quicker, and really, you have proven time and time again. that you will be stronger.
Great words have been posted to you. These wonderfful people never fail.
It gets so natural to detach from them, but to detach from what is done to the kids, I think that may never take place.
When you are less hurt, really sit down and calculate. You know if it has to be fought, then it has to be fought.
I KNOW that awful feeling, of going back to court,or losing this "friendship" that "seems" like it is keeping things calm and status quo.
It is so hard to fight them, even when we know it is for the right reason, and it is for what needs to be done.
It just goes to show, how big your heart is babygirl.
How you can see him in the distance as someone that has created so much hurt, but still hold that memory of his loving ways with you and those babies that you know was so real.
This to shall pass. Who would of thought that after this hellish ride and after the intense pain, and unexpected joys we have received. We still at times, need to stop, feel and know this to shall pass. But it most defenitly will. Have a great time at that birthday party with those babies. Love you.
Live Simply Love Generously Care Deeply Speak Kindly Leave the rest to God
