Heya- well, last night I was at a Dare to be Fun and Crazy Women's meetup group and tonight was a Cooking and Socializing meetup. I had a good time at both; pretty much have my socializing done for the week. I am reading a book called The Introvert Advantage (again) and I just feel so...vindicated. I simply get tired from a lot of socializing. It's how an introvert is wired. It's not 'bad' it just 'is'.
Anyway--met some really great people. And I might even host the Cooking meetup next month..we'll see.
On the H and I front- blech. He couldn't come over Wednesday because Tuesday night he was puking his guts out and he left work early on Wed to try to finish recuperating. Instead he came over Thursday. I made a really nice salmon dinner; we watched TV and at 10pm he left. This is probably the second time in 8 months he has ever come over and then left without...well, you know, without. If it wasn't the second time in 8 months, I probably wouldn't think anything of it, but it is SO out of the ordinary, it is hard NOT to make a mental note. Alright, he was having some sort of gastro-intestinial 'issue' that was rather, erm, pungent, but he has never let that stop him before. There seemed to be some distance. Same thing on the previous Sunday to Monday when I saw him.
I have been SO sad lately. Cry cry cry. Cried today, cried last night; I don't know what the hell happened from Costa rica to today, but I feel like I 'blew it' somehow.
Currently he is jamming to get a demo tape burned to submit to a contest. The drummer can't seem to get the timing right and the due date is fast approaching so they are busting their butts to get things down pat and recorded.
He is supposed to come over tomorrow night for dinner.
I am having a VERY hard time. One part of me wants to hang on and keep trying and stand for the marriage. The other part of me says "WTF are we all doing?!? Obviously, the WAS doesn't think we are "the one", just isn't "into us" and doesn't want to try. WHY are we (LBS) busting our a$$es to try to get them back?!"
ugh
heh- but thanks for asking how I am doing
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
