Feeling financially dependent has to be a drag. Have you thought about a job? Maybe now is a good time to look into training, building a network, preparing just in case.
I have my own little business - H is non working partner. he also has his own business of which i put 20 years into building with him. Still his attitude is what makes me feel dependent. I actually work quite hard and make enough money to support. He pays no child support and thats just because we are not really at the nitty gritty of money. A hate it . Not being someone who pays much attention or cares about money I hate talking about it.
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I thought about dating but it just did not feel right.
I know what you mean. It would really feel like the end to do that so you dont go there. BUT as the one that had the A i must say that my biggest fear is the H does find someone else. I know it would not be differcult for him and he would probably REALLY never come back to me because of all the pain I put him through.
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No, I don't think she knows. I imagine she thinks it is too far gone at this point. I have no way to tell her. Like I said, no contact whatsoever. Not a single word in 7 months. Court ordered. I can smile, which I do. I always look nice. I am always laughing with the kids when she sees me for kid exchange. I don't know what else to do.
I cant believe that she can be happy with no contact. She must surely miss that contact herself. I would of only been happy with that if I was in fear of being integrated over A again and again. I think you msut somehow let her know that you are over A and just want to rebuild the M. What would happen if you sent a letter ? Could you use a friend or family member as go between. Although you hate to involve anyone else. How do you share your childrens successes , failures , happy times , etc . It does not seem fair to the children for you to have no contact. The work of communicating falls to them every single day. They are paying the price of this M breakdown. I thought in todays modern world we all agreed that the less impact on the children the better. We know they get hurt the most anyway so W should be lessening this not increasing. Hmmmmm must be away through this mess for you.
Have fun at the fair. I agree about each little thing life brings. This process is still a day by day for me. At least I have stopped crying. Still waiting on DB books.
