W pregnant with OM's child.......

[lost_in_space]

Since OM left and they had a falling out over the pregnancy she has done a 180 in terms of how she acts around me. I can almost guarantee she still wants a divorce though. No way to tell without bringing it up and getting shot down. Maybe I should wait a bit ?

I would definitely agree with that - but if she wants it and you do not, I would NEVER bring it up. FWIW

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Since OM left and they had a falling out over the pregnancy she has done a 180 in terms of how she acts around me. I can almost guarantee she still wants a divorce though. No way to tell without bringing it up and getting shot down. Maybe I should wait a bit ?

I would definitely agree with that - but if she wants it and you do not, I would NEVER bring it up. FWIW

I completely agree.

And I like "I'm sorry you're hurting."

That you don't want a divorce, and that you are there for her, is implied, she knows it, and it's shown in your actions. To SAY any of those things is pursuing and needy/grabby.

BC, her move back toward you is still all about HER at this point -- her rejection by OM and her need to be comforted and rescued from the message she's created. Is it NOT likely about you yet.

So . . . comfort, yes. Rescue, no.

Puppy

[InLikeFlynn]

I wouldn't say anything....just be there for her and let her come to you. She may not be overly receptive to that statement yet just give it time.

[badcompany]

Good stuff. And good to see you again PDT. If I don't hear from you again for awhile have a good weekend and stay out of harms way

[badcompany]

I have no idea how hard it would be to tell my wife that I got someone else pregnant. She is probably shocked that I responded the way I did.

[lost_in_space]

BC

Save yourself the headache - do not try to figure out what she is thinking. She is reeling as well but you CANNOT rescue her or save her from herself. Show you care by actions.

[badcompany]

hard. Very hard. You see it is much harder to GAL now that I know she has a baby growing inside of her. Very protective of her without coming out and saying it to her

[badcompany]

I think my wife is either afraid to ask me to help raise the baby, or doesn't want me to.

It is still early. I think she's less than a month along. I am having trouble GAL when everytime I see her or my son or her family I am reminded of all this.

the "all this" I refer to isn't the fact that my wife is pregnant.

just the fact that I got the papers and she still doesn't want to make things work.

I am plenty sure she is more worried about being married to someone, pregnant by someone else who blew her off.

I feel so bad and just want her to come to me. I WANT to rescue her, but I know its absolutely wrong. so is coming back to me just because she's pregnant and alone.

[badcompany]

I know God doesn't punish people like this, and she brought this on herself, but I feel like God is testing me. how, i don't know.

[badcompany]

puppy said her reaching to me for comfort ismt about me yet......how will I know when it is ?