2) 'When a divorce occurs [after an affair], it is because the infidel can not escape the affair in time or cannot face going back into a marriage in which he or she is now known and understood and can no longer pose as the chaste virgin or white knight spotless and beyond criticism.
You know, I've thought about this in my sitch, too. My H is very much a person, because of his family background, that thinks if something is broken, it cannot be fixed. ("Don't even bother! It will only cause more pain to prolong it!") When he moved out and had an EA, and I found out about it, I think it erased what small chance we had of reconciling in his mind--because he had messed up too much to go back, I think he felt like. Not so much an issue of my forgiveness or deal-breakers, but his own.
Interesting...thanks for that, HC.
It is in the shelter of each other that people live.--Irish proverb
