I was better by mid day yesterday. Work took my mind off of the BS.
D11 called me this morning before she went to school. Things sounded so hectic.
I get to the office this morning and was puting out fires first thing in. I check my emails finally.
First my work emails. She decided to respond.
First mine from yesterday morning:
"Afternoon.
My cousin Brian's daughter is having a quincanera this Saturday. I believe it may start at 1 or 2 and last for a few hours. Mom would like the girls to attend with her. I can get a more specific time frame if you want.
Will you PLEASE respond and let me know if they can go?
Thank you."
This morning I get:
"Good Morning,
That would be fine, just let me know what time you will pick them up, so that I can have them ready. Ask your mom if they should dress up?"
So responded back:
"Thanks for getting back with me.
I asked Amanda last night if it was something that she wanted to go to because she sounded a little reluctant to go.
She didn't want to meet people she didn't know. I told her family will be there, but I didn't want her to feel forced to go.
I told her to let me know today if she wants to go to it. If yes, then I'll get the specific info and let you know.
Have a good one."
Then I check my Yahoo. The one from Tueday that I had forwarded from Pastor and asked about the packet of Retro. I got this morning:
"Good Morning,
JuliAna seems to be getting better, she just has very bad allergies. When you called she was still trying to wake up so that’s why she seemed quiet. No funny look given. Cancel my part of the car insurance, makes no difference. Yes, I did look at the packet you gave me, but I am not sure I want to go that route right now, still trying to get settled in and catch up on the things I’m behind on. "
I am not going to look very deeply into it. I'm just glad that she didn't blow me off. She responded late as hell, but she responded to me.
Glad isn't even the right word. I just hate being ignored. Who doesn't?
I suppose I will respond to this one. Let her know I'll cancel the insurance, but payment is hitting today(I checked). And again, thank her for responding, I guess.
Or should I?
Just out of curiosity, what did this email sound like? The two things have nothing to do with each other, at least to me.
Need to make plans for the weekend.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
"I am not sure I want to go that route right now."
h4h, she is NOT SURE. Her saying she wants to get settled in is like saying she is going to "try this OM life out". If you want to save your marriage, I would recommend you having a talk with her alone about this.
Will your plans this weekend include other women? Have you now decided you are just going to do whatever you want to do?
"I am not sure I want to go that route right now."
h4h, she is NOT SURE. Her saying she wants to get settled in is like saying she is going to "try this OM life out". If you want to save your marriage, I would recommend you having a talk with her alone about this.
(((H4H))) Of course shes not sure, shes mixed up and saying she wants to get settled in is another way to say - "I want to stop feeling bad about the way I'm acting." I think she thought moving out would make her guilt go away and it hasn't. I would talk to her too.
You will know when you can't fight anymore. Only you know when you are done and its not up to anyone else to tell you when that time is. We are here for you no matter what you decide and we can only give you advice based on what you post here and our experience. For me personally, I warn you away from the alphabet girls because...Iam a girl and you are an easy target for the circling vultures. Just my humble opinion.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
h4h, she is NOT SURE. Her saying she wants to get settled in is like saying she is going to "try this OM life out". If you want to save your marriage, I would recommend you having a talk with her alone about this.
That's the whole reason for her moving out in the first place, isn't it? That's basically what she told me towards the end.
I will consider having the talk. I have said that I'm not going to badger her. I've given it to her, I have asked if she read it and now she has responded. Whether she really read it or not, remains to be seen. I just have to take her on her word, which doesn't carry much weight anymore.
I just plan on going where I go. Tonight, I want to go back to the first live music place. Roxy's. I might be going it alone. No calls or invites so far for the weekend. I just want to enjoy myself. Just be OUT. With who makes no difference, as long as I'm out enjoying. Even alone. Not looking for anything other than being out and listening to some music.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
(((H4H))) Of course shes not sure, shes mixed up and saying she wants to get settled in is another way to say - "I want to stop feeling bad about the way I'm acting." I think she thought moving out would make her guilt go away and it hasn't. I would talk to her too.
How do YOU guys picture the talk? What needs to be said to her that hasn't really been said before?
Because I post so much, ya'll have as much insight into her as I do. Maybe better because I'm too close to it.
To me, she is just gone. That's why I keep going where I go. Too tired of hurting.
Away.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
(((H4H))) Of course shes not sure, shes mixed up and saying she wants to get settled in is another way to say - "I want to stop feeling bad about the way I'm acting." I think she thought moving out would make her guilt go away and it hasn't. I would talk to her too.
How do YOU guys picture the talk? What needs to be said to her that hasn't really been said before?
Because I post so much, ya'll have as much insight into her as I do. Maybe better because I'm too close to it.
To me, she is just gone. That's why I keep going where I go. Too tired of hurting.
Away.
I think it could go either way. But you should have zero expectations.
You sound kind of up and down lately, I'm sure we all do, but you are maybe a little too up and down? I think you have to kind of go on living your life, with as much GALing as you can fit in (as you've reminded me lately ) and trying to enjoy your life and kids as much as possible. I'm surprisingly happy even though I guess this may be one of the tougher parts of my life right now. I think you need to work on being happy and peaceful by yourself without W or an X, Y, or Z. Did you do the goal setting and how are you doing with your goals btw? And did you put in some fun goals? I put in like do something fun just for me each day as one of my goals. Karen
But you are saying you will go by yourself which is HUGE!! You are trying to get yourself to a better place of mind and soul. It is difficult not to think about W because you have been doing your life together up until this situation arose.
I am sure you are getting tired of hearing it, but keep focusing on you and what you can control will amke a world of difference for you.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
) and trying to enjoy your life and kids as much as possible. I'm surprisingly happy even though I guess this may be one of the tougher parts of my life right now. I think you need to work on being happy and peaceful by yourself without W or an X, Y, or Z.