The fact is those gifts are on their way...I'm nervous now. They are set to be delivered today, and I think he's getting home tomorrow. Still, it's just possible that if nobody was there, they won't have been delivered, and I can still make up for it on Monday. Otherwise, really the notes were lighthearted, and the books were in line with his own interests, not mine so at least he'll see the intention was right.
What gift can I give myself? Hmm...what I want more than ANYTHING is a week long retreat with meditation, exercise, lots of solitude...I have in mind that this will make everything better for myself. I saw one in Southern California that I could combine with a business trip so not have to pay for airfare. Problem is it's $2600, and in Euros this isn't too bad, but then I'd need to let H know. I have stock money in October, but I don't want to talk too much about future finances as this is pressuring. I don't want to give the impression that my money is mine only, but I also do feel this way a bit, at least in terms of the extras now like bonuses and stocks.
I also worry that if I talk about needing a retreat, he will know how stressed I am.
ITH
Me:34 H:36 M:5 years T: 8 years Bomb: 07/17/08 I want to be separated for 6 months--I don't know what I want the outcome to be S 07/28/08-11/08/08 Living together ~7 months D Possibly busted?!?!!!
