You know you get to the point where you say, "Hey what am I doing. This is my life, it is short. Why am I giving up my power and emotional well being to a cheating, betraying, irrational, lost soul." "I feel sorry for him, I have compassion for him, but I will not lose myself in HIS mess. I have already lost so much time and precious moments because he was unable to cope with life, NO MORE"
This doesnt sound like giving up to me. This sounds like strength within. I WILLINGNESS to live and live well.
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Losing my mother, got me to this point. Life is good. God wants us to be happy and get the most out of this beautiful world. Because our Ml'ers cannot do that, does not mean we cannot. We have to move on. They may never be able to find what is important.
I agree--- and WAITING for them to get there to me is different than standing....STANDING means (to me) believes in the "OPTION" to open teh door if they come around....on our terms. WAITING to me means that when they becon (sp??) we will move towards them....
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Don't get me wrong, I am still standing, but with open eyes. We all are entitled to love, to be loved, to be treated fairly, to be valued and shown affection. I will not be his punching bag, his scapegoat, his source to expel his evil from his soul.
My mother loved him but said to me before she died that she did not think he would come out of his crisis for a while. She knew the value of life because she was losing hers. She did not want me to miss out on one single day. I have chosen to not do that anymore.
There is VALUE of life....YOU DO deserve to be LOVED. AND you are on teh right track..
T- you just lost your mom...and you have road a pretty hard journey. You have moved on with such grace and dignity....I believe in the way you are standing.....I believe it is the way we are suppose to do it....moving forward and not looking back....
Have a good day my friend.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
