Groundhog Day WAW #16

[hoosiermama]

The old oak tree's bark was like scales of an aligator. - That is a metaphor.

No, actually it's a simile.

Christ should come in here and upset some tables!

I hate to state the obvious, but yours would be the first, followed shortly by the scribes' and Pharisees'.

AmyC, you crack me up.... I never casted you out... I only said for you to go home.

Same thing, Phil, same thing. You're splitting hairs. Just like the argument you're having about marriage as sacrament. An outward sign of an inner truth. Marriage is not an excuse for codependence; a sacrament is holy. Holiness is ultimately wholeness, what God wants for us. God did not intend for us to be codependent.

This is a critical understanding; this understanding can help you greatly in restoring your relationship with your wife. I predict that you'll reject it because it's coming from me, probably even label it "egocentric psychobabble." But what the heck--maybe someone else reading this may be open to it. Knowing where we end and our spouse begins is essential to a healthy (and holy) marriage. Understanding that they are not responsible for our happiness and we are not responsible for theirs. We are not responsible for their responses, they are not responsible for ours. We are creatures with free choice; we can choose how we respond when our spouse pushes our buttons. We can choose a healthy response, or we can choose to blame them for a childish reaction from us. We can choose to follow the letter of the law, or we can choose to work to understand the spirit of the law--as Jesus taught. It is a sign of a mature faith to make choices that will bring us closer to holiness. You were given free will, Phil--what choices will you make? Will they bring you closer to God and to your wife, or will they continue to push you away? I'm not talking about your wife's choices or what she needs to do--I'm talking about Phil's choices that can either support rebuilding your family or support bolstering your ego. Your choice, Phil.

This is not weakness--unless you believe that Jesus was also weak. I don't believe that.