New month, new strategy

[istherehope]

Alright literally forcing myself to go to the gym in the next few minutes. I had a real backslide today in terms of PMA. I didn't reach out to H or anything, beyond sending him the birthday email. I think it would have been really rude not to send anything. However it does strike me as weird that on his birthday of all days he isn't reaching out to me in any way. I know his actions don't control my attitude (or they shouldn't anyway!). It's just that he's so inconsistent that one moment I think we're making progress, and the next I think he's decided the worst. I guess I'm mainly confused about why he has ignored my email on the joint sessions, the real 180. I guess I need to remember that even though he is improving by leaps and bounds, he's still depressed and for all I know that email didn't even register with him. I never know when the "real" H is around vs. the alien depressed H.

OK going to the gym now...This will be good for me!

ITH