My heart honestly and seriously goes out to you. I know first hand how difficult it is when your spouse is cheating on you and you know that it is happening, but all of the lies makes you feel like you are going insane. My now xh wanted to be married to me but yet have his girlfriend on the weekends. That is really messed up, but he was trying to convince me that it was normal.
The first thing you need to seriously look at is if you honestly would want to take him back if it comes to that. Can you forgive and do what it takes to make your marriage work again after he has lived with someone else? If you can say yes to that, then continue GAL and having no contact unless totally needed. Wait and see what happens. Do things differently than you have been.
The really bad part about all of this is if your spouse does not want to come back. I read Dobson's book (Love must be Tough) and it really didn't say how to react when your H does not want to work on the marriage. Hence I am now divorced. I worked as hard as I could to save the marriage, but in the end he wanted to be with this OW and not me.
It isn't hopeless for you. I know it feels like it is. But the best thing for you right now is to focus on yourself and not your situation or husband. I know it isn't easy. Just take it one day at a time and hang in there.
Sara
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
