I'm back after a long absence

[123snap]

Hi, thanks so much for all the support. It really helps.

I have been doing better with backing off, there have been several times I have really wanted to say something or question him but I have just let it go... not really worth the cost to discuss it with him.

H went for a walk with me last night voluntarily, I basically said I was going and asked if he wanted to go, then left it up to him, acted like I didn't care one way or the other.

H also asked if I had my list done yet, I didn't but I do now, will wait for him to ask for it. Monday I asked him if he wanted to postpone the counseling session that is set for tomorrow, he immediately said no, why? I just said I was just checking and left it alone.

So overall I am doing better with the distance and not hanging on every word/mood he is having. His communication with me has been improved, more general talk and not as much angst showing on his face. So I think backing way off is the way to go. In the counseling session I will take the part of listener and stay away from the used car sales pitch. I really feel like he has a lot of venting to do so I will let him, I can process myself and then discuss with my counselor and decide if I want to address anything in particular. I do better if I don't shoot from the hip anyway.

Tipper I don't know how you have had the strength to let him come and go. I have said to him he can't go and come back because I don't think I could handle it, but I wonder if he leaves and changes his mind what I will do... I would rather just avoid the whole leave thing.

School is going to help me keep my mind busy, although I was very frustrated with a couple things yesterday, I talked to H about them, but I think I probably should have just sat on them, they were school related so not R stuff at all.

I appreciate the support very much.