I always feel weird when I talk to W and she asks me if she can do something for the kids that I would normally do.
She called a few minutes ago and was being decent and asked me if she could come over and 'make dinner' for D13 who is sick with the flu.
My response is that I can do that, she doesn't have to come over for that reason. So she says "well, I really just want to come over and give her some 'mom love' and since I'm there I thought I'd make her some dinner.
So I said that 'mom love' is always a good idea and if that's what she wants to do it's fine with me.
It's hard to separate 'visiting' the kids with 'care taking' the kids. I am their primary caretaker now. But she wants to be able to be there when they are sick, which is fine. But I'm not sure if I'm drawing a boundary or being a jerk.
-- Edit
I transferred her to D17's phone so she could talk to her. I talked to D17 after, to ask about dinner plans and said that 'Mom said she was coming over to make dinner for D13, is she cooking for you also?'
D17 says (kind of angry) No, mom asked me to go out with her for dinner and I said I didn't want to and she got mad, then she said she'd stop by and say 'hi. I don't know what is wrong with her'.
