DB superstar? Not sure about that... The most important thing I try to continue from my DBing is taking care of my appearance - exercise, clothing, W even bought me cologne which I use (never used to). The other thing is to stay positive and upbeat - the ol' PMA. Grumpy gF is banished as best as I can, though falling into old patterns is easy and takes constant vigilance.
GAL continues, but together. We have stayed active both with SD8 and alone as a couple. This past weekend, for example, we went to a party with some work people Friday. Saturday went out to the local casino with BIL for drinks/band/casual gambling (I won $20!). Sunday, went to the IL's to help splitting and stacking wood for their wood boiler -- he had 9 cords, ugh! Yesterday, just getting some stuff done around the house and getting SD8 prepped for school today.
Funny, that W seems to look upon my rekindled friendships with female friends during our separation with some suspicion. Probably some self-guilt redirected. I don't think she understands my involvement with this board fully either (it IS kind of a unique place), so unfortunately coffee side trips are probably best put on hold right now. I miss our talks, though. XOM has faded away again after trying to contact W more last week. I think/hope he is finally getting the message. W has been pretty firm and consistent in dealing with him.
The thing I gladly have NOT continued from DBing is not initiating contact. I try to touch base with her a few times every day during work. I used to "go dark" during the work day, so it is a change for me, and W really appreciates it. During our short-lived reconciliation early post-bomb, W felt "smothered" and "needed her space". Now, she is always considering me in her plans -- it feels completely different. Her LL is "quality time" and also "words of affirmation", so I try to focus on those things.
So far so good!
Me45 W35 M6 T8 D16 SD11 D0 Dec 07: Bomb July 08: Busted! Thread
