New month, new strategy

[istherehope]

Hi JCJ,

Problem is that we had this 700E charge come out of our account the other day, and we chatted about it on Sunday. I know it had something to do with H's work, but I needed to do a 180 and act like it was cool with me, and that we could deal with it (in the past I would get SO annoyed with his employer and the way things would be debited and not credited quickly). He offered to cut back on the budget here and there (wish he would offer to cut back on the hotel expense while I'm in Dublin and ask me to stay there!), and so I actually said that I had been thinking of going to Sweden but probably shouldn't now because of the charge, but that that was fine, and we would be fine with the setback. I had reserved a deluxe suite, so it would be about 500E, plus food and everything else. I am pretty sad not to be going, and I had held out hope until last week that we might still go together. However I am fairly certain that he doesn't get back from his work trip until after the flight. I am also pretty certain that he wouldn't want to go with me anyway. We have money in the budget for him to go to Prague, but I gave that as a gift, and I can't go back on my word now...

The only way it could still work out for me to go at this point is if he actually offers. So my idea, tell me if you think this is OK, is that if we talk on the phone tomorrow, I'll ask what day he's coming back from South Africa. If he asks why, or if he says he's coming back before the flight to Stockholm, I'll just say that I was thinking there's no point in wasting both of the tickets to Stockholm, and that since he'll be in Dublin anyway I was thinking he should just go since I hadn't canceled the hotel yet.

There are a couple of potential benefits from this, maybe? First, maybe he would actually just go, and this would be fine, as it could do him some good to go and relax in a nice hotel by himself. Hopefully he would also see this as me getting it that I am not trying to get him to go on a trip with me and that I respect his alone time. Or, possibly, he'd say that he can't go, but that if I wanted to I should still go. Of course it might have absolutely no impact at all, and maybe I shouldn't bring up the trip, period. Of course it would all depend on the tenor of the conversation, on whether he sounded like normal H or alien H. If he sounds like alien H in any way, I think I will end the conversation right away. If he sounds like normal H, then I will know that at least he can hear what I'm saying.

Any thoughts on this?

ITH