what I would like to see are times when you continued to firm up the boundaries you did when you made her leave
it seems to me that letting her come over and do whatever is being wishywashy on that boundary
does that make sense
like you said no messing around or you are out, except when you call and are polite and then you can come over
you deserve to see yourself as worth more than that
she is who she is
who I am concerned with is you
and
i am not bitter about my divorce or the person LSS is and, in his case, always was
it is what it is and without it i never would have met the amazing person I am with I never would have felt I was worth as much as I am getting
and
I too was abused as a child but it did not make me into a person who flakes out on their life do not make her a victim of her circumstnaces we all have choices we make them and then we have to deal with the consequences
our lives are full of choices good and bad
don't make excuses for her bad behavior it takes her power away
