I got lost but look what I found.

[JWS]

I was deep in thought the entire drive home about something you said then when I got home and read your post you said it again. It was how you feel about your confidence and you’re self right now. I think it is very normal for this to come and go and that’s not bad. I want you to know that it was you that made me realize that no matter what I was better for this, and this is about her not me. The same applies to you as well.

I know what his thoughts and feelings towards you mean to you. Remember that right now all of his thoughts are kind of messed up, so if you know that about other things then know that his thoughts about you are messed up too. For now put stock in what other think of you. We all have that part of us that needs to be filled up by the good things that others think of us, since our spouse can’t do that you need to rely on others. I am sure that your friends and family have a much higher opinion of you and that is what you should be listening to.

The only way I was able to not believe what she told me was to believe in myself and that did not happen until a friend pulled me aside and man to man told me what he thought of me until I was in tears, because I had no idea that people around me felt that way.

You were in your best position to detach, empathize and support him when you believed these things about yourself. I am sorry that he broke down that wall this week but I am confident you can rebuild it.