Sorry, but didn't really get the computer this w/e with Josh at the cottage. But I read your post and am thinking back to a few other people who had very similar situations. A few guys, even who had children, did not let anyone know where they lived. They thrive on the secrecy and they want to be far from us. I know of at least 2 that lived in campers.
My ex and maggot (ow) found her car with slashed tires and immediately assumed it was me. No way I would do that - I happen to know that HER husband did it - he told me, but my ex and maggot went to the police station and tried to take out a restraining order on me and on my son. He had visited his dad a few days earlier, found maggot there, and was extremely angry and hurt. But there was no violence. The police considered H and maggot a joke and no RO was issued.
I changed the locks as soon as Ex left. 4 years later, after saying nothing, he became enraged in mediation about me changing the locks. He did admit to being abusive (that is why I changed them) but didn't think I should have changed them despite the fact he lived with maggot and I did not have a key to his place. I didn't even realize at the time that this could be a problem. Like Snodderly suggests - be sure to ask your L about this.
And you are right. Only you can say how long you will contine to fight for this man. When I began questioning whether I loved him or not - that is when I knew I had done as much as I could. But we are all different.
Be patient about getting replies. Many people have mamy things going on but it doesn't mean they don't care. Post to others on their threads and you will make some friends who will start to check on you more regularly.
