You are correct to point out when the "tone" of a post is an attack on your W. It is the frustration some have with her but she should never be attacked or degraded.
She is a person, like you and I, trying to find her way. From her point of view she is doing the best she can and realizes not the hurt she may cause along her journey. Or maybe she realizes it, but her focus is elsewhere now so it is not processed.
You are doing well to support her while you go along your own journey. Yes, we still love them. I would take a bullet for my Ex, no question. But I cannot let her be the focus of my life.
Instead of showing her what life is like without Frank, show her what life can be like with the new Frank. From my knothole, that is exactly what you are doing when you pay the bills, set firm boundaries, and work with her best you can.
So keep it up.
You ARE a good man Frank. I am fortunate to have "met" you.
You are doing the right thing by your W. And there is never a wrong time to do the right thing.
