Something that may help with all of the different posters that speak to you here are reaching out to you because they care. Whether they are speaking to you the way you respond best or if they are speaking to you in a way that is frustrating, they definitely care. They want what you want...you and your family restored. They especially care about Phil. I believe that is God trying to say. "Phil, I love you!"
IRMAC suggested the daily emails from Rejoice Ministries. That is an awesome idea. It helps keep me focused and it is amazing how often the specific messages seem to address the thoughts I have for the day.
I admit I dont know your entire story and what has transpired through this entire ordeal for you but I can say that I am reading about a man that loves his family intensely and wants to not only obey Christ but has the desire to restore his family.
You are not alone.
Something I want to share with you. I dreamt about my wife last night as well. It was tough waking up because the dream was really nice. Even after nearly two years of being apart, it was as if we were connected and together. Then I woke up.
I am not saying this to make you reflect on your own situation negatively but to let you know that hope rests in Him. For me, I gave up controlling the situation awhile back. I do not have a perfect relationship with my children but it is much, much better than before these problems surfaced between my spouse and myself.
My W is now texting me in kind ways (still rare) when before she had nothing to do with me. Will we only be friends in the future? I have no idea. All I know is that I trust Him who has promised that He will see that I prosper if I am faithful to Him and do not give up. I know some incredible scripture that has helped me get through some extremely tough times. (I probably cried every night for months, with her gone from our bed).
My W also works nights. I had trouble deciding how to handle this "problem" but was able to let her know that I would do anything to make sure that she could see/have the children when it was more convenient for her and the children. I told her that it was as important to me as it is to the children and to her that they get to spend as much time together as possible.
Can I recommend that you say the same to her? I am not in your shoes and not fully familiar with your situation so it may not be appropriate or feasible. I have even said to my wife that I would prefer that the kids be with her than regularly staying with other relatives if I am unavailable. I was inferring the same for the situation in reverse by using that "tactic".
Phil, I don't claim to know everything because I surely don't. I have added you and your family in my prayer list.
I hope today is a wonderful day for you.
Me:56, W:51 D:26,S:24,S:22 Married:18 Bomb 9/27/06 Separated 11/27/06 Divorced 10/6/08 Leaving it up to God
