The Door That Never Closes!

[Treese]

Hi.....well yesterday was S11 baseball games....H picked us up at 8:15 and I didn't even ask him too....he told me the night before he would pick us up....so I just said ok...

we went to the games...he carried my chair, the cooler, everything...I carried nothing....strange....we talked a little during the games...he's a coach so just small talk...he can look at me and give me the look and I know what he is thinking....he did that yesterday and I knew it was about a part of the game...gosh I really do know him....he got his coaches shirt and changed his shirt...chubby middle but I just smiled to myself....then he threw his other shirt over the fence to my chair...got drinks out of the cooler I brought....it was a nice day....

When we left we came back to the house and S11 had to shower so H could take him back to the campgrounds with his friends....I went upstairs to help son gather clothes and when I came down H was laying on the couch watching TV, and in his normal spot on the couch....not on the other side like a visitor....I may be reading a lot into this but it was just strange...when S11 was done D16 was ready for me to take her shopping so I asked H to move his car but they were ready to leave so we all left.....

I took D16 shopping, got her ears pierced, and double pierced...looks cute...then I took her to dinner....wanted to spend some one on one time with her...she drove...yikes!!! she needs more practice

When I got home I went up to shower and I had texted H a little while before to see if they arrived safely to campgrounds...it's about an hour and a half away....he texted back about 30 minutes later with what had happened when they arrived and how they couldn't find them, etc....made me laugh...just like old times....he was joking about stuff..in text of course....he texted me about 15 times....never done that...I just responded upbeat...not much talk and then I said be careful driving home...and he ended with.."I will...later",,that's it....haven't talked since....

My mind is going crazy.....I know I need to file, to protect my kids....I think he is being nice cause he wants me to go easy on him....I say that's too late but on the other hand.....GOSH,,,,I miss him...WHY?..when I see him I want to jump him...I am still attracted to him even with his middle....I want to just go up and kiss him, hug him....YIKES!!!!!!!!! I think I'm just sexually frustrated....LOL!!!!!

Could he miss me? I really haven't talked to him much...been kind of ignoring him since the letter thing....he goes to court Wednesday....now when those results come in...it will be like going over this allllll over again....

Thoughts anyone