Just got back from Chicago. All in all it was a pretty fun week. I decided to come back early so I could have tomorrow to get things done. On Thursday I head out for New England to see family and MY ocean. When you are landlocked as I have been, I find I have become very possesive of My ocean when I finally get to see it again!
So last week I talked to ex and was as frustrated as ever. There were some insurance statements that he had reminded me that he needed and I promised to stick them in the mail. Truth is that he leaves me so frustrated by what he thinks our relationship should be that I decided to sit down and type out 3 pages of "telling it like it is". I wrote it and put in everything and more of what he did and why I don't ever have to forgive him if I don't want to. This has always been a theme with him. He hates that I won't say what he did was ok, and everytime we speak he wants me to feel sorry for him and be OK with it. So I wrote this big long scathing letter about how his "road to happiness" was paved with the hurt that he caused to all of us. Further telling him that until he deals with his issues nothing will ever changes. Then I read it over and realized that it didn't really matter if I sent it or not. In fact it was better if I didn't, because just getting it out and mapping out all of the hurt and pain was enough for me. My final note just read, "Here is what you were waiting on. Hope all is well." The End!
Truth is I know the score. In fact, I know it better than he does. I've dealt with it and needed to figure out how much forgiveness I needed to allow myself in this whole mess. Now the rest is on his plate.
Oh I also saw Jersey Boys yesterday and LOVED it! It was really good. I didn't realize that it was a Bio of the 4 Seasons and not just about the music. Pretty Cool!
