Even after all this bull crap tonight. She goes and does something totally different. She dropped the kids off at her parents at 6:30 stayed for a half hour and then left.
She is no where to be found. She told me she would have the kids call me if they were staying over night at her parents. I said I wanted the kids in Mass with me tomorrow. Then there is also a family party on my side. I said I would like to take them. She said there was one on her side. But she wouldn't confirm anything with me. Now she is out in lala land.
I have received no phone call. So I called down there at 10. I talk to daughter and son. Son seems very sad and he just wants to be with mommy. I told him I would call her and find out what is going on.
I call her. I get a voice mail, I don't leave one. She text me. What?
I call again. No answer. So I leave a voice mail.
She text again. What?
I call again. I goes straight to voice mail.
She is out screwing around galavanting and she doesn't want me to know what she is doing. I don't care what she does. I said it to her nicely on the voice mail. I said stop hurting the kids. I don't care what you are doing. Who you are with? You can blow up. Just stop hurting the kids. You didn't call me to tell me if they were staying over. I have a right to know where my kids are staying. Nothing is confirmed for tomorrow.
She doesn't want to talk to me. She doesn't want to adhere to anything. She balantly does whatever she wants.
Now her idea was not to involve lawyers in this. Not to be in domestics. She was going to be my friend through all this. She said she has forgiven me for the past. She stopped saying I love you. She stopped all afection. She has gotten worse.
My head is clear. I'm not depressed anymore. I haven't cried in days.
I don't care what she does. I will love her unconditionaly. I'm not hurting anymore. I have been pumping up myself with vitamin C and omega 3's.
You know I called back the kids, and asked if there Mother called them yet. They said no. Son sounded as if he was in a better state of mind. I said I can't get a hold of mommy. Do you want me to come get you. He said no. I'm thinking that MIL brainwashed him and manipulated him.
I told the kids to put on their grandfather.
I talk with dad. I said dad she is in one of her moods again. She isn't talking to me either. She was suppose to have the kids call me if they were staying over you house. I have a right to know where my kids are. Now she went out and is acting goofy, because she doesn't want to be a mother. I said Dad, I asked you for a favor the other day. I asked you to have the kids call me at 10 when they are staying over your place. He says, (daughters name) Did you know you are suppose call your Dad when you stay over. She said no.
I said Dad, she knows, but she is a kid. They are not going to call. I said I asked you for the favor. If they are with you have them call me at 10. This is on you, because I don't feel comfortable calling your house late spinning my wheels wondering were my kids are.
I want my kids to go to mass with me, and there is a party on my side that I was going to take them too. But I'm not sure I want to drive the hour and half. He said he will drop the kids off to me at 11.
I said She is a tornado, and I know you don't wnat to hear it. I don't care what she does, but she needs to stop hurting the kids. I don't want to call your house, because Dad I don't want to talk to you.
I'm not getting help anywhere...
A schedule. We have been over that. I guess partly I don't want the responsibility of having them a week at a time or whatever. Getting them to school. Picking them up from school. Etc. The burden is on her. I see that as a lose for her. She works a messed up schedule the problem is on her. I have become the babysiter while she is at work. I also want to see those kids everyday. I almost do.
She is the one making a daily schedule difficult. Then to top things off she doesn't talk things through with me.
I'm sure she had tonight all planned out. She knew what she was going to do. She was going to drop the kids off at her mothers. Act like nothing is going on, and go party or something. She doesn't want me to know what she is doing, because she knows what she is doing is wrong. Dead wrong.
I can go and file full custody. You are going to read about a county in PA that gets destroyed by her.
I can put my foot down and tell her to not to come in the house. Change the locks. And your are going to hear it on the news that some woman destroyed a county in PA.
I can refi the house, but I don't think she will sign. So I will just waste 300 on an appraisel. Then we are still married and if we do divorce. She want more from me. She will still want the house.
I never should have given her that money.
She doesn't want off the car insurance. Because I don't pay child support. I have them kids allot. Maybe she should be giving me child support. Maybe she should be giving her parents child support. I'm not even sure if she gives her mother any money to watch the kids. Her mother and father are enabling her.
I'm ready to do the divorce paperwork. Will she? She has been avoiding it.
I don't want to married to this jezebel any longer...
I keep thinking there is a great deal of peace in this household with her being gone. When she does show up. The peace goes away.
None of this, or any of this matters, because the woman is coo coo for coco puffs. I have to decide not to put milk on it anymore.
I'm shutting off these cell phones. She hides behind them. She misuses them. She text now rather than talk.
What if I wasn't here one day when she needed to go to work. She would burn down a county in PA. I don't need to put my kids through any more heartache.
That is why I keep telling everyone that things will not work.
I'm jumping around here. I put the favor on her Father to have the kids call me. He plays dumb. I lost all respect for him.
Don't contact her. Really I don't. Yes, when she initiates I linger too long. Only contact her in emergencies. Everything to her is an emergency.
The bottled water incident. Petty. Throws it in my face. I couldn't do one little thing for her. How can the woman expect favors when she treats me like crap?
I'm done... I just need to find a way to implement the divorce in a calm way. I don't think divorce is the answer, because it will still be about schedules. The kids. Etc...
I don't want to be like my Dad and only see my kids every other weekend.
I try to hold on to the end of the rope. I have tied a knot.
I get slammed on this board. I don't know why I think I'm benefitting from it. Maybe I am. Maybe I am changing. You folks have a funny way of doing it.
I think I have helped others on this board tremendously.
Puppy btw, you can post to me again.
Bworl... Thanks for following. I do heed your words. I heed everyones words.
This is a tough sitch, and I'm trying to make it end as quickly as possible and that just isn't possible. I tend to make things worse. Fail, fail, and fail, until I suceed. That has always been my motto...
I went to a yard sale today. I was talking to the guy and I said I was looking for a ship wheel. He said he had 20 inch one. He brought it out. It gorgous mahogoney, very well made. With a brass inlet to hook it up. He said 10 bucks. I almost fell over. I just saw one for 60 on ebay. I scratched my head. The lady said she wanted to make a clock out of it. I scratched my head again. I got my wallet out. I counted my money. Only eight dollars. I said I got eight. She said deal.
Then we chatted for a little while. I said I don't want to be coy. But I feel like I just ripped you guys off. They laughed.
I also bought a book there 2 for 5 bucks. The book I bought sells on ebay for 60 or 70 dollars. I really ripped them off. Hey what they don't know will not hurt them.
As the pirates say... Savvy be LostPhil. Lost at sea... not feeling that anymore.
God speed... ding ding, Slow this ship matey. Let me gets me bearing...
