Divorce was final today

[thrillisgone]

I know the man she is involved with. The last time I saw him, he was groping another womans ass after a business social function. His girlfriend was upstairs asleep. He was professing great love and affection for his girlfriend during the business social function.

So he is somewhat predatory. Mix in alcohol.One hormonally challenged woman and group of fun loving but morally screwed up people and these things happen. Affairs don't just happen in bad marriages.

My W has regressed emotionally and the more obvious conclusion many of her friends came to as well the therapist (I spent thousands on since she left,) is that she is looking for a father figure. She is 45 and he is 69. Her father is dying.

My W knows this is screwed up. She has not only ditched me but thrown out a great deal of her sentimental possessions from her family, our marriage and her childhood. She is re creating herself and deconstructing her former life.I asked her if she was in counseling. She said "No, but I probably should be"

Family thinks she'll come out of this. Of course she has destroyed our marriage, hurt us financially and certainly taken a big chunk out of my heart.

She is obviously hurting. But there is nothing I can do. She wouldn't go to marriage counseling. She is not in therapy now. She is involved in a long distance out of state affair with a man old enough to be her dad. He is challenged in few ways. This is a real mess.

FWIW after 30 years together we rushed through the divorce in 4 months. I could have dragged it out a little longer. But why? I just let her go.

I still love her deeply. I've expressed forgiveness. I've given her lots of space. I've now let her go. Someone told me to look out for her in the next 12-18 months. I don't know.