(((Everyone))) Thank you so much for taking the time to post and give me such great advice.
((ITH)) - Thank you for your support. You are right that I don't know about ow for sure and it could be innocent (!!). I think that is a really good idea to act as if.
((JWS)) - Thanks for stopping by and giving me such great advice. You're right that this is such a new experience that we are kind of floundering in the dark - that is why I'm so glad I found the boards as I was doing a terrible job on my own before! That quote from Lost is spot on and it is how I feel. It isn't the thought of him with another woman that upsets me so much as seeing her around so I suppose I know how I should deal with that one and you are right - to stop snooping! Thank you so much for your support!
((Dan)) - Thank you also for stopping by, your posts on my thread always gives me a smile which is a great tonic!
((Pisces)) - You are right I am assuming. It doesn't do me any good does it?! It fogs my focus and I shouldn't let it do that.
((OD)) - After your previous suggestion I did try sending h a you tube link of a bus - no response as yet. I loved that first link, it so made me laugh and the 134 brought back memories! Urgh, I hated that bus but now I look back with retrospective fondness.
I suppose the thing I am concerned about with not contacting him is that the next time we are due to have contact is when he comes up for the second house session and that won't be for a while it sounds like. I reckon maybe the middle of September. I find it irritating that I just have to wait for him to be free. I have no excuses/ opportunity for contact between then and I would so love for us to do more bar/ pub meetings after work after the success of the last one. I want him to look forward to seeing me not allocating me times for tasks and then using the time apart to forget about me and block out the pain (I know he does this). I think I know that dark. dim is probably the right tthing to do and my anxiety in wanting to see him has a lot to do with me trying to save our home. It is quite a battle for me to seem happy about selling up and one I constantly battle with.
On a different note, I went out for a meal last night with some important work peeps and we went to a posh restaurant. I ordered what I thought was going to be a really nice steak (it was called Steak Tartare) and it turns out it is raw meat. I had to pretend that was what I had meant to order and eat it - eugh!
and the 134 brought back memories! Urgh, I hated that bus but now I look back with retrospective fondness. 
