I've jsut caught up with your thread. You seem so clear and that is great. I'm sorry that things with your family are difficult, I can imagine that it must be very difficult.
(((Pisces))) and thank you so much for your insightful comments on my thread.
things are really good....we looked at more houses in 2 different locations yesterday...i am just going with the flow...i think it is more a way for him to really feel like we can do anything...im just not reading into too much right now and having fun with it all...
although i am getting a bit anxious to change it all- i am very excited and i have wanted to do this for a long time...
last night after our day of looking at homes we made dinner here - it was so warm and beautiful outside- my H lit candles and we had such a nice dinner...then we talked about everything..not just R...
but he said- soooo- are we meant for eachother? i smiled and said a simple yes. what do you think? some how he turns it all into a joke and said how do we know if we are sexually compatible...ha ha ha.
so later that night - we you know what'ed- soooo nice. very connected...
im still just waiting for him to move home or say he wants to be with me forever and ever....not too far off i think...
one thing that did come up yesterday was he was sort of joking and said- what if we sold everything and moved to costa rica? i said ok...why not? we have one life to live- why wait for the future- we never know what will happen to us...he said...thats what is so great about you- you are open to anything...he also said its good and bad- meaning my excitement and spontaneity...i think it scares him bc i realize you can do anything and change your path - he is a little more rigid in that regard.
anyway- still truckin along- not taking things personally, loving him, having fun and not getting too serious. i havent cried nor do i want to. its all good. no drama. just letting him sow his oats.
he is going to visit his parents next week which is odd- never does that alone- i tin he is going to tell them we are getting back together- bc he is a little concerned with how they perceive him- another growth phase for him..and maybe he wants to talk about something im not even aware of....
who knows?!
things are very good- DB'ing works.....give it time...thats all its about. and love yourself.
xo xo B
Pisces M 31 H 32 M 7 yrs S 5/10 Beginning Contact! Vibes Hot Tub Cheese
Keep up the good work, I don't think that any one on this board needs to be told that M is hard, but in a way you could be moving into the hardest part. The good news is you are no longer doing it alone and you can now both roll up your sleeves and get to work on each other. Always remember how great this feels so that you will continually be inspired to do the hard work!! Your an inspiration here, and I am so Happy for you
Me 27, W26 T-12 M-4 SEP 4/29/08 Holding 250 miles Awaiting Support Current
Once again you're my DB idol. You make it look so easy! I'm sure it hasn't been, but your posts are always so positive, and it seems like you've been following the DB way all along.
Really well done, incredibly happy for you!
ITH
Me:34 H:36 M:5 years T: 8 years Bomb: 07/17/08 I want to be separated for 6 months--I don't know what I want the outcome to be S 07/28/08-11/08/08 Living together ~7 months D Possibly busted?!?!!!
proof that my brother (family) is crazy: i told him we were thinking of moving bc the house holds a lot of neg vibes in it blah blah...my H and i talked about this and he said it would be fine if i started discussing this with my bro. well my bro started screaming that my H is a loser and negative and is dragging me down! this was after my bro called me and asked the real reason why we were moving..he said you are too close to dad, right? i sad yes- that’s part of it. then he went nuts! i was furious and said do not ever talk about my H like that again- he comes above you. i was so pissed i hung up.
then he called me over and over and i emailed him and said im sad for him that he has to say these types of things. he said we are being idiots for moving, etc.
i am sick to my stomach bc it is just so mean. he has no idea what its like to work your ass off for a marriage. no idea. this just gave me more clarity as to why we have to move.
i actually feel ok bc it just so clear. to have this poisonous vibe is destructive.
i obviously wont tell my H ever- but it is just sick. my dad and bro have always had such negative energy towards my H. they really dont like most people anyway. And they spew negative hatred for their livelihood. That’s how they get their way and how they are “successful”.
so sad. get me the F out of there!
i just had to vent here! im shaking.
Pisces M 31 H 32 M 7 yrs S 5/10 Beginning Contact! Vibes Hot Tub Cheese