I was reading a post somewhere else, someone was worried about you, you made mention of the Steeler game, I had to come find you and check on you and tell you how much i loved the steelers! I am alone all day til the kiddos come home for dinner, and live in the boonies on a farm, the lack of people interaction, was just making my life worse, someone suggested I get more friends, and boom here I am lol!
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
I told daughter I was just joking to see what mommy would say. She said you are so silly dad. I said no honey I think it is sad that your mommy doesn't care what I do. She agreed.
I'm not an expert, but what the experts (including my own counselor) tell me is that it is not good for the kids if parents enlist them into the battle. To point out that what one of their parents is doing is wrong or makes no sense - that puts a great deal of inner stress on the kids and it's hard on them. Better to let them just appreciate their parents now; just let them see only the good. When they are older they will see more of the truth, but they are too young now. They need to just love love love their parents regardless.
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I talked to son and he was so tired he didn't want to talk to much. Then he hung up. I called back. Wife picked up. She said oh he hung up on you on accident. Her and I talked a little. I vented how homework is killing me, and it is so grueling.
She doesn't care, but wait are we not suppose to believe nothing we hear?
Yes - believe nothing they say and half of what they do. Tthat's how the saying goes.
Yes I was waiting to get smashed about enlisting the children into battle.
I'm trying to stay cool.
I went to that Steeler game and let me tell you. I again would rather watch it on TV. $7 bucks for a beer. $20 to park, but I got us hooked up and parked for free. A bunch of weirdos. The tickets were $70 in peanut heaven. My bud has season tickets. It is like Farienheit 4541. Everybody getting padded down. Empty your pockets. The game started and there was still thousands of people at the gate. It's just too expensive and it was only preseason. Etc... I had a great time though.
We left the game early to beat the crowd and traffic.
My wife started acting goofy around 9:39. Son left me a voice mail that he wanted to stay with me. She text me. Hes fine i don't know y he said he wanted to sleep w u? I text: Cuz, it is his home. Your home, and I am his dad. You are my wife forever. Like we are in Christ forever.
At 10:30 she text. Can u drop a bottle of water off and leave it by the front door cause daughter is flippin she can have water on her desk and she only wants bottled.
I ignore it.
10:34 I receive a text We r going to bed. I text back Good night.
10:38 Did u get my mess.bout the water
I text: Sorry that is not my prob. You flippen all the time was. There is a bottle water at our home.
In the morning I text: Bottled water is on our porch. Have a nice at school kids.
When I got out of the shower I noticed she pulled in the driveway. I get dressed fast and walk outside. She is pulling away. I gave her the phone gesture. She rolls down the window. I asked for you to have them call me. She said she is running late, with tone. I said I want called in the morning to wish them off. She drives away Mach 1.
I call her and she doesn't answer. I leave a vm. I asked for you to have the kids call me in the morning. Please have them call me after school.
She text. Ok. I might just keep the kids at the store, but might not because boss will be there.
I text her. You are welcome. (Implying about the bottled water. Why couldn't she take care of it. It's funny how she can drive to my house to get the bottled water, but she can't go to the gas station in the AM to get the water. Even if she was running late, she could have went back to school after dropping them off.)
Why because she is a goofball.
I text her: Car insurance is $$$ this quarter due the 22nd.
Nothing...
Why, because she is an insolent, spiteful teen.
I don't know what to do because of the extreme lack of maturity on her part. If I go the other route and instill things I'm afraid she will turn into a tornado and that will not bring me closer to my goal.
How much longer should I put up with it. Until I can take no more. Water off the ducks back.
I have another funny story. My son told me that mommy needed new tires for the explorer and grandfather had mentioned that tires for it are expensive. I said well son that isn't my problem.
I just love it. I mean she drives like a maniac. Drives on the berm of the road. She probally doesn't even check the tire pressure. Just puts gas and goes.
So when that explorer is trashed. Then what is she going to do. Take my Jeep...
SirPrizeMe, Really I hardly watched the game except the first few plays. I was too busy people watching.
I think the Steelers have the number one fans base because where ever you go or whatever city you are in. It becomes a sea of black and gold, BABY!
Funny the wife called me on the cell during lunch. Her boss wants to see the kids and doesn't mine if they hang out at the store until I can get there. She sounds cheerful.
Should I have not taken the call so fast? She doesn't even take my calls.
Stupid nature of me. Phone rings once at my desk and I answer it.
I know what you mean about the Steeler games. Expensive, but quite a spectacle. I took my kids a couple times and it was a real treat for them. They LOOOVED it. Still talk about it.
The best way to do it is with a bunch of good friends, same people every week. Find a good tailgate, a bunch who cooks up good stuff. Always a nice time. Still, expensive.
About the kids thing - I wasn't really "smashing you" - just offering what I learned. Take it the way you like. For my part, I have learned a lot through my own thing. At first I wanted to tell my kids - look, I'm real sorry about this crap you're going through, I think your mom is nuts! My counselor advised me that while saying that might make me feel better, it would cause long term lasting effects in the kids. They need to love their mom, even if their mom is not perfect. They need to be able to look at her as a 100% good person. If they grow up hating mom, or disrespecting mom, then when they are 23 yrs old, they will get married and do the same thing to their spouse. I didn't know that. So I leave them out of my dramas with their mother. Something I learned ...
Turns out MY wife's mom did that to my wife's father - indicted him and criticized him. My wife was 6 when her own mom had an affair, checked out of the marriage. The father wanted to reconcile but the mother walked away (kept the kids, though). For years afterward, the mother basically crapped on the father, blamed him for everything, criticized him in front of my wife and her sister. He was a good man, started a new family, is now very successful, has grandkids, started a business. But my wife's mother was hurt and tore him down mercilessly to the kids.
And now my wife is repeating history. When I talked to the counselor about this, they say, it is not a surprise. He said this is what happens when parents conduct a land war with the kids in between.
Sad.
M 43 S14 S13 D11 D7 Divorce final: Jan 2009 Making it up as I go....
here's something I saw on another thread just today
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I had read a book called Love and Respect and how we cannot wait for our spouse to show either love or respect first. If we do, we will probably never see it. It becomes a vicious cycle.
M 43 S14 S13 D11 D7 Divorce final: Jan 2009 Making it up as I go....
Hey Phil so glad you decided to go ahead and go to the game! I was really upset I couldnt see it on our tv, BUT did have my Big Ben stuff on lol! I am so proud of you for making yourself go and try it anyways!!! Wow you have had a very busy 24 hours! Hang in there!
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
