Hey Jen...man I missed alot!!! I agree, stay calm, and smile until your face falls off. Amy is right, this is HIS issue, not yours. You told him when you would be home, period. So you did nothing wrong. Besides, sometimes making a DAM feel like a DAM is satisfying just by smiling calmly.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
He has told me that he wants me to meet new people and get a bit of a life that doesn't include him so much and then when I do look what happens!
At around 10pm I was telling people I soon had to go and that I was going to have one more beer and head out. But before I could I got his message. It is HIS problem not mine.
Ok so I won't let on that I'm pissed if I did something wrong I would admitt it and apologize but not today. HE owes ME and apology but I won't hold my breath!
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
That is exactly it! But don't have an expectation for an apology. It is always the same. I think they feel better saying you "have their permission" to get over them, but when it starts happening, they really don't like it!
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Hi Lola! Always a bit of drama in my world I'm laughing at it now but last night I would have ripped his head off lol
I had to call him about D. I asked him if he had midday class because I do and I was wondering about D. Do you know what he had the balls to say!!!!????? "oh so now your worried about D" As if I don't give a hoot about my kid! It's not like she was left alone ...she was with her Father! I calmly told him I was wondering what he was going to do and he told me they were in the club and that he had midday class. I felt diplomatic to say the least.
I bet the DAM forgot what time I told him I'd be home. I'm sure if I went down that tunnel he'd tell me I didn't tell him a time but I remember vividly the convo. I honestly don't know why he's so upset!
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
Last night was a pub night from the Hash group. Every Thursday is pub night and I'm thinking of making it a Thursday night thing for me. And besides it's a great chance to meet with foreigners which means conversations in ENGLISH!!!! Spanish gives me such a headache
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
I think making thursday nights a regular *you* night is the right direction. You need other people in your life, and having friends who speak your language ia never a bad thing. In fact, it might make you feel a little stronger and a little less *needy* of your H. All good.
Hey Jen just popping by. I agree with what's been said -it's his problem. You don't have to fix it, he's out of your control. You said you are frustrated, different form of anger, but normal. So keep detaching, don't take the bait. The first time my W started going off on me about something she was responsible for and I said, "I'm sorry you feel that way but that's not what I did." It was like using a Jedi mind trick. I was in control now of me. Not riding her rollercoaster and trying to please her. Exactly don't play his game. Start empowering yourself, it will feel and look good on you. Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I mean is this a form of sabotage? I get little freedom in the night and this!
Please help because I'm ready to go there and rip his head off-
Hi Jen. Just taking my eyes off of my sitch for a minute. I can understand completely how you are feeling.
YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS FEELINGS.
If he gets mad, that isn't your fault. It's easy to fall into that trap because you want him to be happy so that things will mend between you. When you next get to talk to him, calmly and maturely tell him that you understand that he is upset, but, that you are both her parents and just because D lives with you doesn't mean that you are the defacto sitter and care giver and in fact, he had best get used to watching D a little more often.
Well, I think that you can see where I'm coming from.
if I did something wrong I would admitt it and apologize but not today. HE owes ME and apology but I won't hold my breath!
I'm laughing at it now but last night I would have ripped his head off lol