I forgot to mention something about M GF - the one that has an H with intimacy issues and they have both agreed to an open M primarily for her sake.
She stopped by yesterday with her signature sauce. Usually when I get busy I drop out of sight for months - even from neighbors next door. And we really haven't talked since my B-day and her revelation about her arrangement with her H. Our not talking is really not all that unusual - especially since I haven't done much gardening so far this year - and her house is behind mine.
I think she was a little nervous. I just gave her a hug and asked her how she was doing. This arrangement probably means H is not going to try to change - and really that is what she really wants but can't have... I suspect she has picked a 22 year old b/c there is no risk - it is not about emotional intimacy. She and her H have a strong R - just no sex.
I posted about it at the time, circled and needed time to let it settle - and I am okay with it. It is a personal decision between her and her H - they are okay with it - there is no reason for me to not be okay with it.
I really am more sad that it has come to this. She was ready to D him 5 years ago when she thought he just didn't find her attractive. Now she has accepted - it has nothing to do with that... But she has also accepted - things will never change.
She did "test drive" before she got M - that part of his reaction to his childhood sexual molestation didn't kick in until after she had kids...
We will go out again when I get back. I don't really care about socially acceptable. She is my friend and that is that.
