Don't know what to tell you. I'm struggling with my own situation, and have no answers there either.
Sounds like you have to let her hit rock bottom... get your own life going and move on. If she decides to come back you can always consider that option.
My W moved out and filed for divorce within a month. She has told me she was unhappy for awhile now, depressed, stressed, confused. She has always made decisions she has regretted, and this will just be one more of them. Nothing anyone can do to change her mind... she's shut out all the important people in her life and is listening to new friends (most of which are divorced 20-25 year old women).
Atleast your wife admitted to a PA. I think mine did, but is living a lie right now.
