Good. Now put it into practice and let us know how he reacts. It might take him awhile before he can open up.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Okay, though he won't be able to know it since I won't be the one calling him etc anymore. I also need for him to make an effort in this if that's what he wants to do. Maybe by leaving him alone it'll help in some way.
Okay, then just let him be. When he feels confident enough to talk, he will let you know. No pressure.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Dar MWG is right. Just make him feel comfortable. I know my h has been afraid to talk to me thinking I will judge him put him down. Your h needs to feel very comfortable before he is going to open up.
When he talks, just listen. Nodd your head smile and just validate. You don't need to say much. You can throw in now and then that is wonderful h, I am so proud of you, thanks for sharing that means so much to me. I like that idea.
Get the point? Everything is all positive and supportive. Geesh this is what I have been doing the past 2 months and my h can't keep his hands off me now.
Something must be working.
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
Hey Dar....hope you have a great day....I agree with you, maybe you should just leave him alone, let him come to you.
I finished reading that book "Love Must Be Tough" last night....I really found it helpful...I found myself though wishing i had done things differently.
Anyway, have a good day!
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
Dar it takes time. It wasn't like I flipped a switch and it just happened. It was months and months and months of showing appreciation, respect and admiration.
There were at times, I was on my hands and knees saying God just help me I am not seeing anything and I wanted to give up.
I came here for support and encouragement. Something inside said don't give up. It really has only been the past 2 months that h has really started to come around.
Not sure if this helps your sitch or not, but hang in there. Be a friend with NO expectations.
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
Dar--I think you will be fine. But like glam said, everything takes awhile.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
