Another one joins the flock (III)

[Mike85]

Actually, na, your "evil" thought has occurred to me and several of my friends. The furnished closet that W and OM live in is OK for them now, since they can play on the lake, but once western NY winter hits... no amount of satellite TV or Wii is going to compensate for cabin fever, especially once our kids are spending more time there.

Meanwhile, I'm in a two-and-a-half-story Victorian.

I've thought about being more distant or changing *something* in interactions with W, but I'm not sure what to do, especially since we have kids. My son's C has cut his sessions to once a month and credited the amicable relationship between W and I for his doing better. I'd hate to disrupt that. Basically, we only have contact during the "kid exchange" now. I don't want to get snarky or cold and then have that either worsen things for my sons' psyches or, if it doesn't get the results I want and I backtrack, get caught trying to be manipulative.

My C says that W is trying to keep one foot in "both worlds." Maybe W sees my standing as a safety net for herself, but I'm not sure how I could change that.

How would I see things after a D? I don't know. I am NOT one of those people who sees himself standing for a decade (or even five years), standing even after their spouse remarries, etc. Quite frankly, I am not religious enough to suffer the remainder of my life in celibate martyrdom while W goes on. I want W back, but I am not willing to go to my grave having spent my lonely life pining and praying for her return.