For the Guy with Kids and a WW 10

[Tiara Boy (CM)]

H4H-

Hi there. You don't know me at all, but I saw that AttorneyTom posted to you, so I thought I might read.

I haven't been on here is a while, but figured it was time to get back on and check things out.

I'm seeing a lot of similarities. Between myself and you. And I'm sure I would see more with others on here. But I wanted to offer my .02.

I have found in retrospect that people in our situations go dark because we hope it will get our X's back. So are we really going dark or is it just a way of manipulating the situation so that in the end we still get what we think we want.

I say "what we think we want" b/c I don't honestly believe that we are entirely sure of what we really want. We as humans become complacent and think what we had is what we want. But, until we can truly step out of that, give up on it, push it away and I mean completely away... then we will know what we really want. And in the process of doing this, we achieve the things that Michelle talks about.

The only way to do that is to focus on YOU! No more her. AttyTom was a HUGE help to me. And as much as I wanted to kick him, I bow to the man today. It took me a long time to realize this.

Until I put all the focus on me, I could not be happy. I was doing a disservice to myself and my kids by being so wrapped up in her. When I finally did completely focus on me, she turned around and wanted to come back. I had realized that it wasn't what was best for me or my kids, but it didn't happen until then.

So wake up in the morning, look at yourself and just be.... it all works out!