My W too is deeply entrenched with OM and I have also chosen an L that is really good, but has the kids best interest as priority #1. And the OM is the one that recommended her L and he is the one doing all the leg work. W even had the gall to ask me if I wanted to borrow his camping trailer for a trip with the kids.
I can say that I really thought my W was going to have a change of heart even while she was living with OM. She told me several times she was on the fence long after I filed. Friends and family were not supportive of my patience in wanting her back. Only you will know when all chances for your M being reconciled are over. There is so much time in your state for your W to come to her senses. Keep DBing for your M, but also do it for yourself and your kids.
Oh, and Jack...that is some nice scenery outside Anchorage. One could live 10 lifetimes and not see all there is to see in your fabulous state.
