This thread belongs to everyone. Even though we've all had difficult times in our M's, and our spouses may have been acting very differently...even if we have to reach back in our memories before our M's went haywire or MLC's went full-blown...there are reasons we fell in love with who we did. What are your reasons?
Here are a few of mine:
1. H is considerate 2. H is dependable and has integrity 3. H has just enough quirks to keep my on my toes and never get bored 4. H is kind and has a strong nuturing side 5. H is intelligent and verbal. Even though we are working on communicating better about our emotions and needs, we can easily have long conversations about all kinds of things and really enjoy talking with each other.
1. H has a good sense of humor and makes me laugh a lot. 2. H gets my sense of humor. 3. H likes "chick-flicks" and sometimes we both cry watching them. 4. H has deep insecurities and is working on sharing them openly with me. This helps me have more empathy for him and brings out the nuturing nature in me. 5. H accepts me, flaws and all, and loves me despite my faults (sometimes even BECAUSE of them).
This might just be the best timing as I'm in a bit of a crappy, irritated mood right now. Could focus on some positives:
What I like about CJ:
1) He's funny, witty,...makes me laugh quite a bit 2) He's very smart...that's good because I'm smart too and without that balance I can REALLY run roughshod over a guy 3) He's sensitive 4) He helps a lot around the house 5) He likes the same kind of music and TV as I do 6) He's a very good dancer 7) He loves cats (almost?) as much as I do
I'm sure I'll think of more...funny thing is, whenever the R books would break out that exercise of listing 5 negatives and 5 positives about your S...I always had an easier time with the positives, of course, that was "pre A"
This is a good post! 1. H is a kind person and helpful to all. 2. H is a wonderful father to our children. 3. H is a very hard worker both at his job and at home. 4. H enjoys socializing with others. 5. H is easy going about many things. 6. H is generally not critical of me. I think I'll come back to this thread as I think of more. Lyn
I love this thread. Sometimes it's easy to forget why I fell in love with my W.
A few of my likes:
1) She's sexy 2) She's intelligent and has interesting opinions 3) She's assertive and confident in her work 4) She has a wonderful sense of humor 5) She has a great smile
Well this should pretty easy for me right now. Since we've been getting along so well lately.
W is: -beautiful -smart(but willing to laugh at herself when she does something dumb) -very outgoing(bringing out in me what I lack at times) -very outspoken(this can be a double edged sword but I'm learning to love that aspect of her personality as well) -funny(and she laughs at my stupid jokes ) -her smile (she has one of those smiles that when she locks on to you, looks into your eyes and smiles, I just know that I am what she wants. I'm trying to keep it that way) -loving (even through her faults and getting frustrated she is a very loving mother and beginning to become a loving wife again.) -fragile(don't get me wrong she is a very strong woman-but she allows me to see the fragile side and to comfort her when she needs) -long red hair(yeah this falls into that beauty catagory, but this weekend at the beach I really noticed again for the first time in a while how beautiful she is so I can't help it right now )
Here are some of the things that I love about my husband:
1. He is funny as hell. 2. He is SO smart. He has a tremendous capacity for acquiring and retaining knowledge . 3. He is the "cat whisperer" -- he's so bonded with our kittens -- they melt under his hands! 4. Sexy, sexy, sexy. Handsome, fit, strong, athletic. 5. He's challenged himself in the past (Marines, school at night, etc) and he's about to do it again (law school)
So many more things!
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
This is a great post really positive. Mind you I am falling into the trap of reading others positives and thinking - hmm wish H was a bit more like that
H is:
Kind and considerate A great lover! Good at his job works hard A good father cute Great cook - yum
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
My H has a mischeivous smile My H likes the same kind of music I like My H is comfortable to be with (we can sit quietly and not feel like we have to entertain each other) My H is very concientious and dependable about his work My H loves kids and they love him back
Ok...I'm joining in on this one...even tho we've got a long road to travel. The things I love about H:
Generous lover Witty and very funny Very smart and well respected by all Good looking Great body-really fit and takes care of himself The best "DAD" to our kids, and they know it! Loves the dog, trained him to be loving too Has creative ideas for fun/travel Great dancer (tho it's been a long time) Worldly in knowledge base, explains self clearly
Thanks for the up lifting thread.....we all need more of these positives to reflect upon. Mooka