Hi silver Fox Thanks for visiting Upside All is well here H said he was cutting my money about 2 weeks ago and I called H/confronted him and said I cant accept the cut tonight he gave me the money again that he had cut for the last 2 weeks That was empowering.. I just cant figure him out I am doing well keeping my energy up and rolling into my new life H is cooperative and I am envisioning a nice co-parenting partnership with him I believe good things are really in store..it is up to me I am so grateful I hung in there for this time as valuable lessons were learned H and I get along well and now I think I know how to talk to H where as in my M I always struggled and could never understand maybe all is meant to be this way I will be ok I will not continue to wait for H-I will seek Gods will Not sure if H has it in him to ever do the work and it is unfortunate to watch them choose what is so wrong or appears to be wrong peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
The other day I watched the "last lecture" - given by a professor named Randy Pausch. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, knew it was terminal, and before get got visibly ill, he gave a "final lecture" at school. It was bright and cheery and thoughtful and even funny. but also insightful .
You should be proud of what you've learned about yourself during this time. I think of what happened to me as a wake up call that was needed. Take what you've learned and apply it to your next relationship, whether it's with your H or with someone else. It's important for us to continue learning and growing (although personally, I think I'm a little stuck at the moment - or just taking a break).
Glad to hear you are coping so well under the circumstances and that H is being cooperative. That certainly helps.
Sirprize thanks for visiting--yes time does work miracles and even if the miracle is me finding my way out of this mness hopefully my H will also find what he seeks My L sent the papers he wrote in their twice W does not agree that the M is over and seeks counseling for reconciliation(Just in case H doesnt know) other than that , all is sailing along here I am getting new business opportunities and feel God is opening a new way I deserve more than this MLC or not ,it is unacceptable Peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Hi peace- You have been so strong and you do deserve more. It is so sad and frustrating that this destruction has to come to anyone's life...but rather than crumble, you have chosen to grown and thrive, all the while letting your H and your children know that you don't want the D. You have continued to do everything to save your M while you to try and live a happy, normal (whatever that is!!!)life. You should feel so proud of yourself.
When my H and I were at the C the other night, my H talked about how he felt like I was an authority figure to him and that is part of why he had to get away. Now, he says how much he appreciates me accepting him on his terms (not questioning him about his choices whatever they may be...grrr!). I hear what he is saying but I still can't help but think that part of this is so skewed and selfish...so adolecent. My H said he sensed a shift in me when I let go (basically when I learned to stuff my feelings...or plain just not care). It seems to me that your H is still stuck at this adolecent phase. He is having trouble getting past it even though, IMO, he enjoys having some kind of relationship with you. Oh well, I guess it doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things because you know you need to focus on you and your kids...I just think sometimes it still helps us to have some understanding.
I hope things are getting easier for you and you are looking forward to whatever new adventures life has to offer.
Hi friends well H went to his L and he finally figured out that our M breakup will cost him a lot My L wrote it twice W does not want D but seekds thereapy with H for reconciliation..H said nothing about that! He just left Not talking much but seems intent on continuing with D Told me he has High Blood pressure now I felt bad for him but when this is all said and done I will be left here with 2 kids to raise mostly on my own I have to get whats in my best interest He will have to accept his own choice to leave and live with the financial loss that he will suffer I cant fix him peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Hi, Peace. It really struck me when you wrote that you felt bad for your H. So different from where I am - I simply have no feelings left for him. He is a stranger.....
I have always gained so much from your posts - in a lot of ways you echo what I think but can't always write. I don't post much anymore due to time constraints, but read your posts (and Ups!)
