It happened again.....

[san]

Thanks WAS33

Have you ever sat down and asked about what was going thru his head when he was gone...Was he wanting you to wait?

Just curious

San

[san]

Well I didnt tell you all the latest drama...

after all his negative last night he texts this morning :

dont count me out just yet...
and then:
Im on the bubble

i responded with:

Kids and i are leaving at 8am with or without you....

wellhe has since said difinately no... his mother told me the girlfriend basically said if you go with her we are done...

I figured that..love it that i was right...lol

we had a few minor texts back and forth..nothing big

he then said..
i will never look at you the same for forcing your way onto this trip...
is said...uhh..
what..we planned this trip when you were home for 10 days f**** me and telling me how much you loved me..
i will never look at you the same for the affair
and you should never look at your girlfriend the same for not letting you come on this trip with your children

i know...bad..bad...but every now and then they need a piece of reality slapping them in the face

sandy

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Sandy,

I know those exchanges make you feel better, and you certainly are justified, but make no mistake -- they are NOT helping your cause.

Please stop reacting to his sh(t.

He needs to look back on this and see his wife, taking the classy high road, and his mistress pressuring him to NOT visit HIW OWN FREAKING FAMILY.

All you're doing is lowering yourself to his -- and her -- level when you react to his prods.

Puppy

[san]

puppy,,


But will he see it that way...he is in loooovvvvveeee....

i know i need to not respond..sometimes it is hard..we are used to talking all thru out the day....i dont want to cut out all communication....

but do you think he is frustrated at her giving an ultimatum?

[Was33]

You need to cut out ALL communication!!!!He relies on you to give him a reason everyday to justify his A. STOP!!! Fighting with you makes his alien brain think he has done the right thing. If it doesn't have to do directly with the kids do not talk to him. And no more ILY's. That just makes them angry. You have to remember that this is not the man you married, this is an ALIEN.

I know this is all very hard, but you can do it. My thoughts and prayers are with. Be STRONG!!!!!

[Molly44]

Puppy - How did you forgive your wife ? My husband will not forgive me my affair. I said all the things your W said to you. But then i also realised my error.

[saffie]

Sany,

The blame game doesn't help anyone. As Puppy said...you need to cut it out.

BY you NOT doing what GF is doing....trying to pressure him...yoyr H will EVENTUALLY see which is the better option. Let GF be the one who moans and groans about things and riuns their R.

Also, what guy doesn't want to be fought over by two womem? Why give him that nice feeling of being wanted so much he can do whatever he feels like doing and will win whichever way he does?

[saffie]

OOps - sorry for the typo - I meant SanDy of course

[san]

Saffie, Was33...

I have to say this is the hardest thing we have ever had to endure.

I struggle every day that he is really gone and dont want that to be y reality.

This will be a good jump start for me with no communication. I wont for 6 days because I will be having so much fun.

His final call to the kids last night was that he difinately is not coming with us. I am sad ...I hoped this would be a chance to see us all interact as a family.

Now it will be a first trip for my new family unit...

Kinda freaked out about traveling with three kids...ugg
I have always had him to lean on and help...

Wish me luck...
Sandy

[lost_in_space]

(((Sandy)))

You can do this. You have the power within you to be strong for you and your K's. Make sure that comes out!

Hey - H's loss so do not even think about it.

Have a great trip!