Strong Boundaries and Standing up for myself

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Personally, if W was taking the kids to school for their first day or not, I would be there too. However, my kids are only 8 and 5.

Maybe in your case, you could take the kids because they live with you and tell your W that she can meet you there if she wants. Not only are you taking responsibility for the kids, you are showing them that you are ready to take on the responsibilities left behind by your W.