Just talked with H... don't know how much more I can take.

The other job he was suppposed to do is now not ready until next thursday, then he has to be out in Ohio by the 11th. So now he's not coming home until the 12th :(.

I have major juggling to do with other jobs he had scheduled for next wk that he can't do now and I have 3 or 4 bids due next wk.

His eye is swollen, due to him working no doubt. He went and filled the pain meds and is sleeping now. I feel so so bad for him. He is going to miss S5 first day of kindergarten and S2 first day of pre-school. He is so depressed and so am I. But Im worried about him, he's the one that's in pain and away from his family and missing out on stuff.

On top of it, I call my mother for some support and she's telling me how I have to keep it together ... DUH WTH have I been doing????? I have my H who is miles away from us and is hurt, I have the business to run and figure out how im going to pay for him to survive out there for another two wks which I didn't account for money wise, I have to precious children at home to take care and the house to run.. so Exactly why is it NOT alright for me to cry once in awhile?????? 99% of the time Im the strong one, but you know what im aloud weak moments damn it!!

Why is it that the closest people around us say the most insensative things????

Sorry to just ramble on.. I have so much on my mind its not even funny.

me: 37
H: 44
Married for 18 years this june
S7
S3
porn issues, and much more... since 7/06

Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.