still can't let go of the fact that I wasn't there for her when she needed me.
If she didn't have that *reason* to validate the affair I guarentee you she'd have another. And it could be something like, "You never gave me enough space." Having a reason will help her alleviate her guilt. No one wants to be fully responsible for their actions. It's much easier to blame someone else.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
