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THank you so much for your support. Yesterday was a very hard day. Both of us said angry words at each other. He again repeated that even without GF he would not return. Said I was a control freak. Very very nasty things neither can take back-but he wouldn't anyway. Only I would. He says he is prepared for a legal fight. Keeps holding cards over my head that if I don't do it his way and quickly get it over with he will make me pay him what I owe him right away instead of letting me pay the share of the house when the kids are older. He says he is prepared to pay lots of legal fees with nothing to lose, he says I will lose the house if that happens and therefore he will get the kids and they will all live with his father. So sad...

Trying to be occupied today, but the thoughts keep creaping in. He is supposed to bring another form for me to sign, I don't even want contact with him, I don't know how he will be. Sure he already hates me.

I should just go on online dating and resign myself to finding a new someone. Problem is my heart isn't in it, I really want him. I told him I didn't want him back I wanted my husband back. He called me many names, I never called him any. Just complained about him and the GF being together. And sleeping with her in bed with my kids on the floor. He sees nothing wrong there. He is the only one.

Thanks