14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
Hey...4kids...if most of the WAW's only knew...if they only knew.......
Quote:
It does make sense. You were NICE and she responded. FIB do soemthing out of the ordinary for your w each day. Kind of like a test.
Glam...I was nice while she was bonking those 3 guys. I've been nice..am nice....always was nice......
Again, Glam...are you projecting? Sounds like you are. Were YOU not nice in YOUR R? I see a lot of that in your posts and I'm not trying to be sarcastic or defensive.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Today..my W turns 41. I took the kids to the mall last night and D5 picked out a light outer black sweater and a white tank top to go underneath it from A/X. Probably spent too much considering what she has done to me in the past.
I left early this AM. Left the gift out on the table with two birthday cards that D5 and S7 wrote themselves. D5 had picked out one of those small mylar balloons on a plastic stick that you see at the grocery stores that I tucked in the bag.
No card or gift from me. Tonite, she goes out with her family for dinner.
Today, I interview in NYC this afternoon...#2. I received my CA medical license application in the mail from the law firm processing it for me...legal fees picked up by this company.
L has still not returned my call re: this job, the recent law guardian meeting etc. Next court date 9/4.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Nice of you to recognize her birthday for the kids.
And don't worry about not getting her anything. It would be odd if you did, given the circumstances.
As for her offering to get you something to eat, recall your own words about baby steps. Brief flashes of a touch with the real world. Nice of her, thank her, and be done with it.
In a time of significant change, it's easy to get overwhelmed. During this time it is YOUR future and the future of your children that keeps you grounded and focused. All eyes forward. Adopt the mentality of the race car driver who has no rear view mirror - what's behind is NOT important right now. The goal is ahead and not behind you.
The day will come when these matters are settled and the next stage of life has begun. I know that when you are not forced to live under a microscope, you will be able to breathe clean air and stretch your limbs once again.
It will be different, and there will be moments where you FEEL the enormity of how much life has changed. But you will be living in peace again, not subject to the pressures of life with someone who has chosen not to be with you. You can surround yourself with people who see the REAL you, not some dark version that is used to justify bad decisions. And trust me, that will be an amazing relief.
Strength and honor still ....
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
FIB, as always, you act with compassion, honor and dignity. At the end of the day, that is what matters.
Let w blow in the wind, it is her journey. Yours is now. Your life starts now.
Best of luck with the interviews. Moving forward is always the right direction. Cherish those children and remember always that you are their role model. You are teaching them the right way to behave. They will look to you to see how a man and a father is supposed to act. They are lucky to have you.
Success...I think I did well at the interview. I get good vibes. I met the second physician...ANOTHER GENERAL SURGEON. And...TRAINED IN CINCINNATI AS WELL.
I get a good feel. Both..kind dynamic men who had busy practices...burnt and worn ...both now loving the job and having much more time with their families.
I want it.
I texted the COO thanking him for his time...telling him I am looking forward to Friday (finding out) and 'optimistic about joining the 'ABC Company' team.
I received several calls during the interview....my W didn't like how S7 was looking....took him back to the pediatrician...he has MONO.
Suddenly, she is calling...texting me....briefing me....updating me..asking questions...telling me about noises the fish tank is making....brought home cake for herself, offered me some...and I sang happy birthday with S7 (saying "HBD to mommy").
I made her coffee this morning...because..if I get the job...I won't be doing it again for a long time, if ever.
If I get this job, now, I think, it may be my ticket out.
Is there a G-d...that sees love? compassion? Did he see me fight to save my marriage and 'say' this guy needs a break?
Or...or...is it just little ol' me...growing...learning...going back to who I was....trying to do what I've said my whole marriage....that I would never let my family down?
Friday.....we'll know. I need to call my atty and tell her that someway, somehow, if I get this....we need to make it work.
My focus is me....a new career..one that gives me time with my children..one that will let me give them the opportunity I've wanted them to have.....
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Oh FIB, I am so happy for you. I truly believe that being the kind of man you are matters. It does. I will say a prayer for you and send good thoughts your way.
The kids are the thing, my friend. That's where the focus should be, that's where it matters most.
So, do something for yourself, FIB. Something fun, let loose. Whoohooo for you!
