Yes, she does need to make changes if I want to be with her. I will do almost anything to keep our family together.

I wonder how well she is going to survive without me as well. I'm pretty sure there is OM, but everyone claims there isn't (W, in-laws, friends that she has gone out with) although there are many times she has been out and unaccounted for. I think there is someone.

I have a small hope that she is trying to prove that she can do this without me. She felt that I controlled her by telling her she couldn't have certain things (purses, house, new car, etc). Always complained that I acted like her father, and I always complained she acted like a child.

I think she was also overwhelmed with taking care of our child especially after spending the first 8 months of S's life as a SAHM and then going to full-time work with little added help from me especially during a long tax season.

I have a question about how to approach the custody question. I have yet to seek counsel from an attorney. She has asked for joint care custody. I think I would like to go for full custody because of her recent behavior, irresponsibility with money, and her lack of discipline with our son.

I re-read DR last night, and I was still making mistakes, up-to and including this past Sunday. I always want her to say something (anything really) to me.

Also, today she e-mailed me 3 times about our S's daycare. When we separated and split our money, she didn't follow our agreement. In addition we agreed to split daycare costs, well she didn't pay for her half of last months payment. She e-mailed me today to ask me to re-open an account so we could both put our half in and then the daycare takes an auto-withdrawal. I've asked her to set up the auto-withdrawal on her account and I will reimburse her because I can't trust her to do the same for me.

I also cancelled our Disney trip when I received the divorce papers. I don't feel comfortable spending another $2,000 when I have the cost of this divorce on the horizon.

I think I'm going to call a divorce busting coach to get some more advice.