Maybe it's Midlife Crisis at any age?

[TwinDad]

The don't hug him.....besides that is far from going dark. Let him initiate stuff like this if there is going to be any.

I don't think you have truly come to grips with it, but you would know better than I would. I understand just how difficult it can be. I have found one of the hardest things is to forgive yourself for what you have done in the R to get to this point. Letting go of the guilt is very difficult but very necessary to detaching. I am not saying you have a lot to be guilty about, but I think everyone in this sitch finds something to blame themselves for. You can't change the past, but you can make a better Poet for the future......this is a large part of what DBing is all about.

Lets work on Poet, this is probably one of the few times that being selfish is going to make you a better person and possibly improve your M with your H.

Let him lead his life, your happiness is not tied to him