Something I posted on Distressed67's thread this morning about counseling between H & I.
I just wanted it here to journal where we are 'at' right now with counseling work.
The C. helps both H & I 'stay true(er)' to the new guidelines we are learning about how to communicate and solve conflicts.
The counseling has helped him learn to listen to me better and for me to share more clearly, than we ever have. We have tried the conflict resolutions stuff by ourselves the past week or so, as homework, & it has gotten really ugly. It's amazing how deep old habits go, even when we have the best intentions not to go there. I still need to do a lot of work.
We go back to C today & I'm hoping that we can continue to learn new habits & how to diffuse the bad situations we get ourselves into, in a way that leave both parties feeling respected.
HOWEVER<.. I was SOOOO unwilling to go to MC with H. He ridiculed my IC & our MC we had, he kept choosing his job over going to MC. (once I left he was ALL about going to MC & I refused).
These are things I know you are not doing... but I think the feeling of the WAW is to resist going to MARRIAGE counseling.
In fact, what we are doing is not really working on the 'marriage' issues as much as commuincation counseling. Maybe that might be something you can ask her if she'd be willing to do with you?
H was willing to compromise- he wanted to jump back into marriage issues & I did not= as I pointed out to him, we would have to be communicating at least for the next 5 years about our D as we raised her.
Divorced 03/2010 Mom to two amazing kids
Taking the road less traveled because those encountered on the way may be just as unique.
