Another one joins the flock (III)

[Mike85]

craig: You're absolutely right on all counts - the kids are #1, I shouldn't feel guilty about getting a lawyer to protect myself and the kids, and the Lord can heal our relationships.

My lawyer friend called me yesterday -just as we were loading the car for the campout- to give me a referral on a good marital lawyer. It's someone who is good about protecting his clients' rights without feeling a need to dive into the muck and go "scorched earth." I'll be calling them tomorrow to set up an appointment.

My lawyer friend asked me to supplement what he already knew about some of what has transpired, and he told me that I'm "golden." Basically the choices that W has made and continues to make have placed her in a bad bargaining position, while my holding down the fort, staying celibate/faithful, dealing with most of the childcare stuff, getting a better job, etc. go under the category of 'doing all the right things." I feel better about my legal situation.

I still plan to pray for my W and the restoration of my M, and I will let God's will for my marriage proceed as I GAL, but I am learning to be more pragmatic with regard to legal, financial, and other stuff.

BTW, the campout was fun. Great time with all the Webelos, their siblings, and fellow parents. One of the moms there gave me some empathy and shared her MLC "war story" - her H gave her the bomb (including his affair with a young hottie) while she was just a few weeks from giving birth to their son. That was nine years ago, and she told me that even though her ex-H is still an @sshat, she's happy, has moved on and has a great new love, a great career, etc. She assured me that no matter what, I'd survive, thrive, and not be alone. It was good to hear, even though we were both being steeped in thick bonfire smoke as she relayed her story and assurances. We all ended up smelling like hot dogs.