Thanks for posting JCJ! Its a tough journey hey? But my goodness 2 months ago I would never have dreamed that H and I would actually want to spend time together, and that H's 'fog' would have cleared enough that he would remember I even existed!!
I used to scream at H 'what do you mean you dont know?'. Sometimes it was things like 'do you want a cup of tea? - I dont know'!!
If I was to do it again, I wouldn't ask questions that I knew he would be unable to answer.... For a long time when H said he didn't know how he felt about me and our R, I thought that he did really know and that he just couldn't be bothered to make a decision to commit. It took me a few months after he left to realise that when he said "I don't know", it actually meant "I don't know"! With hindsight if I was to do it again, I would validate his feelings - "Gee that must be tough to be making a hard decision and not to be sure of what you want" - that type of thing.
Now if he said that he didn't know, I'm detached enough it wouldn't faze me. If he doesn't know what he wants, it really doesn't effect me - its his problem!
